take a deep breath

You don’t have to choose between

taking care of yourself and caring for the needs of others.

You have a gazillion things to do and most of the time you feel like you’re not doing enough of a good job. You’re constantly worrying about getting in trouble, losing people you love and asking yourself “what if my family needs me and can’t do things for themselves”? And when you are challenged that way your default conditioning is to self-sacrifice.

I know how hard it is to prioritize yourself when a million little scripts are written daily about who you are and what your life should look like as a womxn, mom, life partner…

You are not alone!

This is the story of so many moms and women. Myself included

HELLO

I'M vanessa

six year ago

I desperately needed to figure out how to leave an abusive relationship.

My Ex-boyfriend was a narcissist (I didn’t know he was – until one day I read an article about the medical condition of narcissism a) and I was afraid for my life. That experience led me on a journey of self-acceptance and self-love, finally understanding on a body level that the love I was looking for was the love I needed to give myself.

I was getting prepared for the work that I currently do with women.

More about my story

Black woman wearing a leopard dress smiling

I believe

That pressure to conform to the feminine of code of conduct, among other things, lead us to self-neglect and toxic relationships with others. In fact, I believe this feminine of conduct is chaining women up in what I’ve named the Happiness Trap. The Happiness Trap gives you the illusion of a fulfilled and nourished life – but indeed perpetuates the idea that prioritizing yourself, deprives someone else of something.

And that tension leaves you feeling exhausted stressed, and tired all the time.

It doesn’t have to be that way. Instead, you can untangle the misconceptions and guilt you carry around caring for yourself and learn to balance giving to others with giving to yourself

that’s the work we do together

Nurture And serve

I'M a SELF-CARE COACH

My clients are exhausted working women and moms raising teens who burned out a few times before and don’t want to go back there – but are torn between taking of their needs and caring for their family’s needs. It’s compounded by the fact that they are people-pleasers and over givers and it seems that there isn’t enough time for both. Basically, I show you how to:

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Slow down and prioritize your daily activities

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Let go of constantly deferring your needs

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Honor your boundaries and be more gentle with your self

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Create a self-care map that fits and sustains your lifestyle,

makes space for you to provide deeper care for your family

and community.

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